Live Tweeting GOP Debate 10/11/11

If you missed the New Hampshire leg of the circus, below is my commentary as it happened in real time.

* Mitt Romney said he “cares about people.” Mormons are taught that. That’s why they marry so many of them.

* I think Romney said he’d make a good leader because he has led on both sides of every issue.

* Gingrich says prostate cancer screenings can kill you. But 5 out of 5 doctors agree the survival rate is higher than having prostate cancer.

* Mitt Romney says he has spent is whole life in the economy, which is like saying he has spent his whole life in weather.

* We should lay off Romney. Just like he laid off 85,000 of us when he worked at Bain & Capital.

* Hermann Cain has said 999 plan more times than the number.

* The moderators are using Reagan’s words against the current GOP. Just like the GOP use their words against Jesus.

* The candidates blame Obama and China for the economy. It’s what you do when you love white people way too much.

* Romney says he understands the OWS protestors. Last week he said it was “un-American.” He’s slipperier than a fluffer’s lip balm.

* Santorum just said, “Freedom loving people.” That’s sexy time talk meant for old people who are scared of brown people.

* The moderator asked Rick Perry about “mandates.” Marcus Bachmann heads to the bathroom. Now he waits!

* Moderators talking to GOP candidates about children living in poverty is like talking to Hitler about a Jewish person suffering a head cold.

* When the moderators showed a clip of GW Bush, America was reminded Perry is GWB but with the HPV shot that gave that one kid “retardation”

* Bachmann made a 666 joke about Cain’s 999 plan. Then got scared the round table was a ouija board & whispered, “Sorry, baby Jesus”

www.cjwerleman.com